Tribalism is probably inevitable, and politics within the tribe. Self-appointed gatekeepers will tell others, "You aren't black enough, queer enough, radical enough, or pure enough by whatever standard to belong to our clan."

But we're all family, and we all need all of us. I sensed it 50 years ago, that Women's Liberation and Black Power and all the other movements springing up were signs of hope for all of us, a chance to break out of the world's constraining boxes and become our truest selves.

Gatekeepers notwithstanding, there are surely individuals who will support you and your choices. Build your own community, one friendship at a time. What else can you do? As Oscar Wilde said, "Be yourself. Everybody else is taken."

Retired psychologist, wordsmith, teacher, MFA candidate. Buy me coffee:

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