Perhaps it's my advanced age, but I remember a time when all of those were simply human virtues, grown-up qualities, equally desirable in men and women both. That's what I was getting at. Do I need to edit that paragraph to make it clear?

My point was, somewhere along the line (apparently in my lifetime), we stopped expecting boys to grow up. I am lamenting the fact that it is now acceptable for grown men to be selfish, stubborn, arrogant, and childish. We still expect our daughters to learn to comport themselves as adults, but not our sons. Why not?