Much respect, Dr. Y, for stepping outside your comfort zone. I enjoyed reading about Mr. BS. Since you have requested feedback, I'll share a few thoughts. Your money back if they don't prove helpful.

As fiction, "Imagine Sheldon" doesn't really work. Your character amuses us with his antics but does not invite identification or arouse empathy. As a reader, I wasn't rooting for him. Fiction readers want to see themselves in a protagonist, and Mr. BS doesn't offer enough humanity for anyone to relate to. That may be why your view and minutes were down compared to your nonfiction articles.

Not to despair, however. Though this story can't compete as fiction per se, it works as satirical allegory. We (readers) recognize that you aren't trying for sympathy or identification, so we suspend those desires and enjoy the way you poke fun at the clueless loser you've created. Allegory is a teaching tool, and you do succeed in teaching us about the different players in the content game, as well as important lessons about what not to do and what not to expect (riches without work). And by your outrageous exaggerations--plus the bits about the mother and the grape gum--you amuse us while you teach us.

If you really wanted to write this as fiction, you would need to cut out the moral at the end--fiction readers don't like being preached at--and expand the story considerably. Mr. BS would need a real name, a life, and a personality that would let us root for him even without actually liking him. (For an example of a lovably despicable character, read "A Confederacy of Dunces" by John Kennedy Toole. Absolute genius, and even better if you know New Orleans.) You would also need to turn down the exaggeration to believable levels and let him do something right once in a while. Sheldon makes us cringe, but he doesn't make us hate him.

Hope this helps.

Retired psychologist, wordsmith, teacher, MFA candidate. Buy me coffee:

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