Many of these problems can be bypassed by an approach of seeking friends instead of partners. Let the sex/romance agenda wait for long enough to establish some compatibility and trust. If you're a great guy, that will come through in spite of being "average" in looks or income, plus the woman will get the flattering impression that you are interested in her for who she is and not just how she looks.

Another old-fashioned approach is to have friends introduce you to people they think you might like.