Don’t know where you’ve been, but most states regard sex as nonconsensual when the non-initiating party is incapacitated by alcohol or drugs, and many college honor codes include language exactly like what I quoted. Those words weren’t something I just dreamed up; you’ll find all of them if you search “definitions of consent.”

Does that mean all drunken sex is rape? Of course not. Many women start their evening with the plan of getting drunk and getting laid. But when one person encourages another to drink, then takes advantage of the other’s loosened inhibitions, they risk being charged with sexual assault.

Rape is hard to prove in court. A predator may be acquitted just because it can’t be proven that she was too drunk to give consent, or that he knew she was incapacitated. But I’d like to think most people want to know their partner won’t wake up regretting the encounter.

Retired psychologist, wordsmith, teacher, MFA candidate. Buy me coffee:

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